What Do You Call Yourself?

A few weeks ago I was working with another dietitian on a presentation about eating disorders and I was  reminded of some ideas that could be helpful to those of you who are struggling with your weight. 

A lot of how you feel is based on your perspective: Your perspective of yourself, your weight, your appearance; whether you call yourself "good" or "bad"; whether or not you feel you have willpower, or if you tell yourself you're out of control, or have ruined your day with a certain behavior.

The Beck Diet Solution talks a lot about this idea of perspective. We're encouraged to take a step back and see "what is really true in this situation"?  In fact, eating something not on our food plan has not ruined our day, made us into a bad person, or shown us that we have no control. It can be viewed as a learning experience, teaching us what led to that behavior and helping us figure out how we can avoid that particular action in the future.

Note the language that dieters often use, placing blame when an extra food is consumed, or exercise is skipped: "I cheated", "I was bad today", or "today was a complete failure" are what we often tell ourselves. 

And that's not true. You weren't a bad person because you made a bad decision.

And that's the key: learning to separate YOU from your actions, your behaviors and your weight.

To change from "I was so bad" to "I made a bad decision earlier today and now I'm going to fix it by adjusting my calorie intake/exercise"

To change from "I am fat" to "I have some extra weight I am working to get off my body".

Because the truth is, YOU are not your body fat any more than you are your hair or your feet or your fingernails. These are all parts of us that we strive to take care of and make nice, but when we have a "bad hair day" we never say "I am a bad person because my hair is frizzy" or "I am so out of control because I haven't fixed my nail polish chips"!

The truth is, maybe something was more important today than taking the time to get a pedicure or put on moisturizer. Maybe we had a sick child to take care of or a work emergency or a family crisis.
We strive to take care of our entire body--and all its parts--every day, but we are not perfect.

Say aloud, "I have some extra fat on my body I am trying to get rid of". 
How does that feel? 
Do you feel more empowered because the fat is not you?

This week, try to separate what you do and what you look like from who you are.

Let us hear your experience with this experiment below in the comments section.

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Think Thin Thursday Tip: It’s important to remember that you’re not doing things like working on healthy eating, resisting cravings, and limiting junk food to punish yourself. Rather, you’re doing them so that you can achieve critically important and life-changing goals.

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Friday Weekend Warm-up: If you get off track this weekend, remind yourself, “There’s no such thing as blowing it for the whole weekend because the calories will keep adding up. Get back on track RIGHT NOW and make the rest of the weekend great.”

Help Finding Calorie Content in Restaurants

I wanted to let you know about some very helpful websites, since this week's chapter talks about planning ahead before eating out.

Most restaurants have a website where you can view their menu. In the near future, many menus will be listing the calorie content on the menu. Some restaurants are already doing this, like McDonald's and The Bread Company (Panera Bread).
See this list at McDonald's which shows you all their items that have less than 400 calories.
And this nutrition calculator on the Panera (St. Louis Bread Company) site that lets you check out the calorie content of their items.
There are websites for most chain restaurants where you can research menu items. I suggest making yourself a list for your favorite places with 3 or 4 menu items you like that are healthy choices. (Note, that although there are a lot of lower-calorie items, if you have other dietary restrictions-- particularly sodium--it will be difficult to find very good choices in many cases.

This table from the Burger King site lists several nutrient amounts for everything on the menu.

Here's another helpful site for dining out: HealthyDiningFinder.com
On this site, you enter your zip code and a list of 30 or 40 nearby restaurants appear. When you choose a restaurant it will show you all the "healthy" options. Usually this means items under 750 calories, so they might not all fit into your meal plan, but at least you'll know!
They will also show you how to make your item more healthy when ordering, such as "salad dressing is not included in the calorie assessment" or "substitute fresh fruit for potatoes" or "order without the side of rice".

I particularly love to use this site when I'm out of town and may not be familiar with the restaurants in the area. However, it mostly uses chain restaurants and it's not often you'll find a local Mom-and-Pop diner with the nutritional information listed.

In the case you don't know how to find out what's in your entree, just ask the waitress to communicate your needs to the chef. In most cases they are more than happy to put the dressing, butter, or sour cream on the side, leave the butter off the fish, or make the pasta with marinara sauce instead of alfredo sauce.

Now, armed with all the information you need, you can still enjoy eating out, guilt free!

Please, if you've learned some great techniques for making dining out while watching your weight easier, do share your tips with us!

What Motivates You? Pleasure or Pain

People are motivated to either get something they want, or to avoid something they do not want. Consider how this will help you avoid eating unplanned foods, or encourage you to be active when you aren't looking forward to an activity.

Ask yourself how you will obtain something pleasurable when you stick to your Beck Diet rules each day, keeping your food diary, planning your meals ahead, using your response cards when you're tempted to eat something before it's time, and incorporating activity times into your week:
- If I do this, how will I feel about myself?
- What kind of momentum will this give me?
- How much happier will I be?

Stopping in the moment can make a huge difference! Before you eat that tempting treat or plop down on the couch instead of going for your walk, just take 5 and consider the consequences.

On the flip side, skipping exercise, not keeping your food diary, giving in to temptations--how will these make you feel or what will they result in?
- What will I potentially miss out on if I stray from the plan today?
- What will it cost me (self-esteem? not being able to fit into that dress for the party? No change on the scale this week?)
- How will it hinder me: physically, emotionally, financially or spiritually??

Have a conversation with the "you" of tomorrow. Will tomorrow's YOU be proud of the decisions you make today? or will he/she be disappointed you were entrusted you to take care of his/her body?
How do you feel about the YOU of yesterday and the choices you made then?

Please feel free to leave your thoughts to share in our comments section.